


Like No One's Listening

by kay_obsessive



Category: How I Met Your Mother
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-26
Updated: 2010-01-26
Packaged: 2017-10-06 17:19:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/56021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kay_obsessive/pseuds/kay_obsessive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Barney wanted to be a violinist.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like No One's Listening

It was stupid.

Barney was in the middle of cleaning out the closet in his suit room when he found the instrument case tucked in a box of his old things, and, instead of just brushing off the dust and shoving it back in the corner where it belonged, he wound up pulling it out towards himself.

He takes it out of the room, sets it on the table in front of his couch, sits down, and stares at it. The case is worn out. The corners are dinged up, and the fake leather is peeling at all the edges. It's out of place in his apartment; the sleekness of everything else he owns makes it look even cheaper in comparison. He can feel where the fake gold plating has chipped off the latches as he carefully flips them up and cracks the case open.

It's been so long since Barney's even looked at this thing. Lily's words from weeks ago run through his head, and he pulls the violin out of its case and cradles it on his lap.

He planned to be a violinist. He had a lot of plans when he was younger, but that had been the first to really stick. It was the plan when he first left for college, but his plans had a habit of going astray.

Still…

Barney shifts a little and moves his right hand over the instrument, idly plucking one of the strings as he thinks. He instantly winces at the sound and drops his focus to the violin. He shouldn't have expected it to be in good shape. He sets it back in its case and walks to his closet again. If he still has this thing, he still has his keyboard.

A few moments later, his finger falls on a key, and he sets about trying to tune the A string.

***

 

It had started with a keyboard, too.

Piano lessons were one of the few luxuries Loretta could afford for her boys when they were little. James never really took to it, but something about it just clicked with Barney. By Christmas of that year, James had quit and Barney had a keyboard set up in the living room to practice.

Mrs. Wrede was a great person and a good teacher, but it was her husband who really made an impression on the young Barney. Mr. Wrede was a violinist and composer who often wandered around the house humming, tapping his foot, and making notes on crumpled bits of paper. Barney first met him when he arrived at the house early for his second lesson.

Mr. Wrede stood in the center of his living room, violin tucked under his chin, fingers curled delicately around the bow, playing with his eyes blissfully closed. His mouth was fixed in a studious frown and a muscle in his jaw seemed to twitch anxiously. Then, without warning, a moment passed, the tone of the music shifted, and a happy smile replaced the frown.

Barney was transfixed. The clock on the wall chimed the hour, and Mr. Wrede slowly opened his eyes like he was shaking off a trance. He looked to the wall and then toward the door where Barney stood, and he offered a small grin. "Sorry, kiddo. Didn't mean to cut into your lesson time."

But Mr. Wrede continued to wander around the house, even during lessons. Sometimes he would stand behind the piano bench and listen for a while. "Sounds great," he would say eventually, when there was a lull in the music, leaning in to kiss the top of his wife's head and gently ruffle Barney's hair.

Once, when Barney was sitting at the piano and waiting for his lesson to begin, alternating between genuinely practicing and just experimenting with stringing notes together, Mr. Wrede came downstairs and paused on his way to the kitchen to watch him play. "You know kid," he said eventually, startling Barney, "Of all the kids Laura teaches, you're my favorite. You've got a knack for music." He gestured toward himself. "Let me know if you ever want to learn to play violin."

Barney could barely keep the grin off his face the rest of the day. That night, he had one of his recurring dreams about meeting his father, but it wasn't Bob Barker this time.

At the end of his next piano lesson, he walked up to Mr. Wrede and said, "I want to learn."

***

 

Shannon fell in love with him because he was musical.

At least, Barney liked to believe she really did love him in the beginning. It would probably be easier just to think she was a bitch and had always been a bitch, but he couldn't do it. Anyway, the way she watched him when he played, that look in her eyes, that had to have been love, right?

It was Shannon who convinced him to put the violin aside and focus on piano again. She loved the sound of it but said string instruments sounded 'scratchy'. Barney was too far gone with infatuation to protest or even get properly offended.

When they graduated, he happily moved his keyboard into the coffee shop, playing for tips while Shannon minded the register.

When she broke his heart, he stopped playing for over a year and threw all his anger into the violin instead.

***

 

They were pleasantly drunk in the bar, he and Lily, just enough to damage that filter between thoughts and spoken words.

"I was gonna be a violinist," Barney blurted out, only slurring a little. The little part of his brain that was still mostly sober wondered why he was telling her something so stupid and embarrassing, but the rest of him was pretty happy with the situation. He supposed after revealing his touchy-feely side and admitting to the whole Robin thing, this little fact wasn't a big deal. Besides, Lily was cool. He liked Lily a lot. "You're awesome," he added out loud, since he was thinking it anyway.

Lily giggled. "Really?"

"Yeah," Barney said, "Not, like, the most awesome person I know or even the second most awesome. But you're up there, Lil."

"No." Lily shook her head. "Not that. 'Course I'm awesome. I mean the…violin thing."

"Oh." Barney looked down at his drink. "Yeah. Really." He lifted the glass and downed the rest of it, shaking his head before continuing, "Don't tell anyone, though."

"Yeah, no, of course. Why would I do that?"

***

 

Barney tests the strings again and sighs. This is as good as it's going to get after sitting in his closet for so long. He tightens the bow and stands up, inhaling deeply and closing his eyes as he prepares to play.

Robin knocks twice on his door before coming in even though she has a key, as if she's still not entirely comfortable having open access to the Fortress of Barnitude. Her entrance makes Barney jump, and only old instinct keeps him from dropping the violin.

When Robin looks up, she freezes momentarily in the doorway and just stares at him. "Wow," she finally says, shaking her head and regaining her senses enough to shut the door behind her, "So Lily wasn't kidding, huh?"

"No," Barney mumbles, still mindlessly holding the violin up by his cheek. "I mean, yes!" he corrects a second later, rapidly lowering his arms and gesturing a bit too emphatically with the hand holding the bow, "Of course she was kidding! Why wouldn't she be kidding? I mean, it's crazy, right?"

Robin tilts her head, disbelief clear on her face. "Then why are you holding that?" Barney opens and closes his mouth twice before he realizes an excuse isn't coming. She crosses her arms and walks toward him. "Can you still play?"

He can't think of a way to say 'you never really forget' without sounding totally lame, so he settles for numbly nodding his head.

Robin slowly sits down on his couch and lifts her chin to watch him. "Can you play something now?"

"I…I guess," he replies, doing his best to sound nonchalant. He tucks the instrument under his chin and carefully lifts the bow, taking another deep breath as he begins to play.

He picks something big and romantic and regrets it almost instantly, because really, how cheesy can you get? Robin's eyes go wide just a few notes in, and Barney closes his eyes and looks away, forcing himself to get through the rest of the piece without panicking. _Shit._

By the time he's halfway through it, the anxiety has eased away for the most part. His gaze flickers up once to find Robin still staring, and he dares himself to meet her eyes as the last note fades away into the room and he lowers the instrument, feeling surprisingly calm.

And then it's silent for too long, she's just looking at him, and he knew this was stupid. Barney pulls his eyes away and shifts awkwardly. "Yeah," he starts, trying an easy grin, but his voice comes out too raspy. He swallows, licks his lips, and continues, "I know. Lame, right?"

His voice seems to snap Robin out of it. She blinks and shakes her head. "No," she says quickly, "That was…really good." Barney's head snaps up to look at her again, and he knows he looks way too damn hopeful. Robin smiles at him anyway. "It was kinda hot, actually," she teases.

A big, stupid grin spreads across Barney's face. There really could not be a more awesome woman on the planet. He forces his features into a serious expression and lifts the violin again, and his voice is suddenly dripping with sleaze and bravado as he offers, "If you want, I could…play it one more time?"

Robin laughs, and her tone matches his when she says, "Well, don't just talk about it."


End file.
